Good article. I've struggled with saying "no" for years, but I must admit that being in a supervisory position at work and being a parent has helped me in this area, as I've realized that my saying "no" to certain people, things and situations in life often can bring greater benefit to my family at home and my staff at work than just going along with the flow would. Melmj
I'm not sure how old you are, but I think that getting older (40 ish :) has helped in this area too, but I still feel the 'pressure' at times to give in to the 'yes' answer. I read an article once, (don't remember where) but it talked about those who say 'yes' and don't really mean it. They put them into a couple of categories like: those who say yes, and then hold a grudge about having to do whatever it is they agreed to do, those who say 'yes' but have no intention of doing what they agreed to do, and those who say yes when they mean it and no when they dont. I thought that was a pretty accurate description, and put in that light, it really boils down to honesty. How honest with others am I willing to be? Am I only honest when it's not uncomfortable? Or, am I honest all the time, whether it's convenient or popular? Tough, I know, I'm not claiming to have this down, although the progress that God has so graciously grown me in, is nothing short of amazing. I think, in the past, I was the 'yes'person who would agree to your face, and then figure out a way to get out of it. Not very flattering, is it? It's the truth, though. I still fight that 'yes' monster, (probably has something to do with the "I must please others monster!), but I do realize now that it's an obedience issue concerning character. It's a far more courageous act, saying no, than lying to please others....any thoughts?
2 comments:
Good article. I've struggled with saying "no" for years, but I must admit that being in a supervisory position at work and being a parent has helped me in this area, as I've realized that my saying "no" to certain people, things and situations in life often can bring greater benefit to my family at home and my staff at work than just going along with the flow would.
Melmj
I'm not sure how old you are, but I think that getting older (40 ish :) has helped in this area too, but I still feel the 'pressure' at times to give in to the 'yes' answer. I read an article once, (don't remember where) but it talked about those who say 'yes' and don't really mean it. They put them into a couple of categories like: those who say yes, and then hold a grudge about having to do whatever it is they agreed to do, those who say 'yes' but have no intention of doing what they agreed to do, and those who say yes when they mean it and no when they dont. I thought that was a pretty accurate description, and put in that light, it really boils down to honesty. How honest with others am I willing to be? Am I only honest when it's not uncomfortable? Or, am I honest all the time, whether it's convenient or popular? Tough, I know, I'm not claiming to have this down, although the progress that God has so graciously grown me in, is nothing short of amazing. I think, in the past, I was the 'yes'person who would agree to your face, and then figure out a way to get out of it. Not very flattering, is it? It's the truth, though. I still fight that 'yes' monster, (probably has something to do with the "I must please others monster!), but I do realize now that it's an obedience issue concerning character. It's a far more courageous act, saying no, than lying to please others....any thoughts?
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